And it turns out they were right, but not with the curve of the belly. For me, the curve of happiness when we are in a couple is everything that makes you fat on an emotional , intellectual, and fun level . Those things that you learn with that person and that you incorporate within you, forever and ever. This is the true curve of happiness, as a couple.
Do you feel that your partner enriches you? Does it give you things? Do you do apprenticeships, by his side? Are you having fun? Do you choose it every day? Despite everything that may happen, and in a healthy way, do you still choose it every day?
I hope the answer is a resounding yes, without a doubt . And if you have doubts, let’s talk. Just because you have any doubts does not mean that the relationship does not work, it is said. But it means that, perhaps, there are things that you would like to change , things that you would like to improve. And all these things that you would like to see improved or that do not quite work are important that you can talk about with your partner. Because that is essential in a relationship: good communication .
Therefore, have you already identified all those things that you would like to improve? First, look for them , ask yourself why you need them to improve. Ask yourself, too, what would happen if they didn’t get better . And share it with her.
If you are clear that you do not like your partner, that you no longer enrich or enjoy being with her, that you do not have the support you need by being by her side, what scares you? What prevents you from considering leaving the relationship? What makes you stay in a place that doesn’t make you feel good?
I don’t want to fall into the trap of saying that you are the only person who can solve this. Because its not true. I don’t want to hold you responsible for not daring.
We live in a patriarchal and capitalist society that is committed to maintaining relationships at any price , selling us an image of love that is not love, which is violence. Therefore, we have learned to tolerate many situations that are not good for us . And we do not have an environment that helps us to have good self-esteem , to take care of ourselves: they educate us to sacrifice and endure.
And in the sphere of the couple this is very present. Therefore, if you are not well but do not dare to take any steps, first of all: seek support, talk to someone you trust, look for support networks that can give you a hand, that help you to ask yourself what you really want to do, and that give you the support you need and that.
Perhaps, you do not find within your relationship of couple. I am convinced that there are many people, whether you know them or not, who really want to show you their support.